Marriage/faith/testimony- Alma 32

Ok I have to share this. A friend who is struggeling in her marriage came across this. I know this lady from a support group I am part of. We at the group all have similar issues in our marriages, and are LDS. We can connect on a spiritual and earthly level while going through the struggles our spouses have brought into our lives.  When I read I was deeply touched. It really made me think. And I wanted to share. You dont have to be struggeling in your marriage to have this help, or apply. I have learned so much from the support of these ladies. They are there, understanding my feelings at all times. I have included her thoughts as she read. I copied exactly what she typed. I did not want to take away from it by changing it.

As she was reading it occured to her to  interchange marriage or relationship with seed or tree. 

Read

 Alama 32

28 Now, we will compare the word unto a seed. Now, if ye give 
place, that a seed may be planted in your heart, behold, if it be a 
true seed, or a good seed, if ye do not cast it out by your unbelief, 
that ye will resist the Spirit of the Lord, behold, it will begin to 
swell within your breasts; and when you feel these swelling motions, 
ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that this is 
a good seed, or that the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my 
soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it 
beginneth to be delicious to me. 

29 Now behold, would not this increase your faith? I say unto you, 
Yea; nevertheless it hath not grown up to a perfect knowledge. (or 
nevertheless it's still not a perfect marriage)

30 But behold, as the seed swelleth, and sprouteth, and beginneth 
to grow, then you must needs say that the seed is good; for behold it 
swelleth, and sprouteth, and beginneth to grow. And now, behold, will 
not this strengthen your faith? Yea, it will strengthen your faith: 
for ye will say I know that this is a good seed; for behold it 
sprouteth and beginneth to grow. 

31 And now, behold, are ye sure that this is a good seed? I say 
unto you, Yea; for every seed bringeth forth unto its own alikeness. 
32 Therefore, if a seed groweth it is good, but if it groweth not, 
behold it is not good, therefore it is cast away. 

33 And now, behold, because ye have tried the experiment, and 
planted the seed, and it swelleth and sprouteth, and beginneth to 
grow, ye must needs know that the seed is good. 

34 And now, behold, is your knowledge perfect? Yea, your knowledge 
is perfect in that thing, and your faith is dormant; and this because 
you know, for ye know that the word hath swelled your souls, and ye 
also know that it hath sprouted up, that your understanding doth 
begin to be enlightened, and your mind doth begin to expand. 

35 O then, is not this real? I say unto you, Yea, because it is 
light; and whatsoever is light, is good, because it is discernible, 
therefore ye must know that it is good; and now behold, after ye have 
tasted this light is your knowledge perfect? 

36 Behold I say unto you, Nay; neither must ye lay aside your faith 
(marriage), for ye have only exercised your faith to plant the seed 
that ye might try the experiment to know if the seed was good. 

37 And behold, as the tree beginneth to grow, ye will say: Let us 
nourish it with great care, that it may get root, that it may grow 
up, and bring forth fruit unto us. And now behold, if ye nourish it 
with much care it will get root, and grow up, and bring forth fruit. 

This is the part that got to me:

38 But if ye neglect the tree, and take no thought for its 
nourishment, behold it will not get any root; and when the heat of 
the sun cometh and scorcheth it, because it hath no root it withers 
away, and ye pluck it up and cast it out. 

39 Now, this is not because the seed was not good,(this is not 
because DH is no good) neither is it because the fruit thereof would 
not be desirable (neither is it becasue your marriage is not 
desirable or wont work); but it is because your ground is barren,(we 
planted in the wrong place...we started off wrong and have been going 
about it all wrong) and ye will not nourish the tree ( we don't pray 
together or read scriptures together or do anything but fight 
together...both of our faults), therefore ye cannot have the fruit 
thereof. 

40 And thus, if ye will not nourish the word, looking forward with 
an eye of faith to the fruit thereof, ye can never pluck of the fruit 
of the tree of life. 

41 But if ye will nourish the word, yea, nourish the tree as it 
beginneth to grow, by your faith with great diligence, and with 
patience, looking forward to the fruit thereof, it shall take root; 
and behold it shall be a tree springing up unto everlasting life. 

42 And because of your adiligence and your faith and your patience 
with the word in nourishing it, that it may take root in you, behold, 
by and by ye shall pluck the fruit thereof, which is most precious, 
which is sweet above all that is sweet, and which is white above all 
that is white, yea, and pure above all that is pure; and ye shall 
feast upon this fruit even until ye are filled, that ye hunger not, 
neither shall ye thirst. 

43 Then, my brethren, ye shall reap the rewards of your faith, and 
your diligence, and patience, and long-suffering, waiting for the 
tree to bring forth fruit unto you. 

I have included her thoughts as she typed them. I really liked the message you get by inserting marriage or relationship. This could apply to so many things in life. Our marriages especially. If we truly feel this way, act and treat our marriages as we do our testimonies can you imagine how they would grow! If the world treated their marriage that well, as such a precious thing marriages would not fail. People would work harder to save them, to protect them, to nurture them from the start. So often we take for granted, and we do not place it in as important a place as it should be. Celestial marriage is our number one goal as LDS people, yet so often we do not make a concious effort to save, improve, nurture our relationship, our marriage, our love. We should! I am printing this and hanging it on my wall as a reminder. I am also sending a copy to L. I know my marriage is not in a good place right now. But I pray for it daily, I pray for God's will daily, his guidance. I think making the decision to nurture my marriage is the best way to possibly save it. No matter what happens on earth I know I want the Celestial marriage, Eternal marriage. There is no way to have that with out nurturing and growing the relationship. I hope that you can read, ponder, pray and apply to your lives, you relationships, and marriage. And for those of you that have already done so- Keep on doing!

What a week!

Well we are moved, still not unpacked but its all here. I am beat! between fixing and unpacking and doctor appointments its been a long week. I made an attempt at fixing the hot water heater, fixed one of its many problems. And in the end a plumber came and put in a new one today! He was very nice, and fit me in right away without charging me extra! Unfortunately he has to come back to fix the tub! The pipe to it is plugged, we have hot water every where but the tub! I so wanted a long hot shower, but I will have to wait. I am however going to go buy an extra long shower hose that will attach to the bathroom sink to use till its fixed. It will be sometime next week before he can come back, I am not waiting! I still have a few other plumbing things needing done in the house, I am going to have him look and see what he will charge to do it for me. If its cheap enough I may just have him do it and save my hands! I have learned a lot through this but I think plumbing is not my thing! I do have to thank my BIL. He was awesome at helping me through the fix it job I did! Thank you B. I still think he should come finish it- I promise breakfast!

We are almost all unpacked. Ok sorta almost all unpacked! We have lots less boxes. Unpacking all the books is like Christmas! I am finding books I forgot I had! I love it! And Baby E is so cute. She sings and dances as we unpack, and as she finds her favorite books. Its adorable. We are almost done getting all the school stuff out. That has been one of my main priorities. The kids have managed to do a little school this week, not much though. Next week they will be back to normal. Loo and Bubba have some testing to do.  Boo may be doing some testing also. 

I took mom(Gma) to the doc this week over the aneurysm. He says he has never seen one rupture where hers is, and hers is small. But he also has only seen one other in the place where hers is, that was with in the last few weeks. If he were to operate it would mean breaking her collar and sternum. He says its not worth the risk. He does not feel she is at risk for it rupturing. I am not really liking the wait till it blows approach. I think a 2ND opinion is in order. I understand not wanting to take a risk that's not necessary, and her health as a whole needs to be considered but I don't know a balloon waiting to explode in your neck/head just seems kinda risky in itself! So we will see. Other wise the doc says she is good, aside from another blockage right below the aneurysm 90%. Don't know if they are going to unblock it or not, he did not say much. She will see the other doc this next week. So we will see what he says. 

The kids are doing good. So far most of them are liking the new home, the yard and space. Boo is still not happy. Bubba likes it, I think. Loo has made friends across the sorta dirt road. More like a driveway, at the house Baby E thinks is a play ground. They are nice people. She runs a day care and always has kids there due to that. They have not had much chance to go explore town yet. They have not been very co operative on helping so I made them stay home. Next week we will go to the Library and check things out around town. The therapist they are seeing knows the sheriff, she has suggested a field trip there. Sorta introduce ourselves, that way they know the kids. So if the kids are out during school hours they know why. So I think we will do that, maybe the fire station as well. 

I had to go buy a new printer. Mine was broke during the move. I picked up a 4 in one this time. Prints, copy, fax and scan. I am tired of paying Office Max for faxes. It does ok pictures also. So that was my 1 splurge outta the taxes. The rest is bills and stuff we need. 

I went to the doc, had the injection in the hip done. Hurts, wowie! I was not sure about getting it done again. But after the 3rd day the pain from it let up, and it actually hurt less than before! Enough that I decided its worth getting the next 2. So on the 5th I go in for the 2nd, then 2 weeks later a 3rd. Hopefully they help. I saw improvement from the one so I think they will. I am back to the Fentaynl patch. Its better than having to take a pill every 4 hours. I am still in pain, but its helping. And this time I am not falling asleep every time I sit still. 

I am going to go back to work. The doc still says no but I cant make ends meet with out it. Waiting for disability to go through is a joke. They take forever, and make it impossible to survive.  I have really struggled with the decision to work again, I know I am not up to it, but I also know someone has to support the kids And I am it.

Nanna is in "H" most of the time. Since she is working there, and going to school there She stays at her friends and comes home on days off. The kids are all keeping the therapist there also. We really like her, I think she is worth the drive. I love her attitude, the kids liked her from the start. I also like the new med doc. She pays close attention, feels like less is best but when something is not working she is not afraid to make a change! I like that. She was willing to give Nanna something fro her anxiety attacks, and changed a few things, adding a med for anxiety disorders. This was a very good thing. She also made a little change to Sir N's meds. Unfortunately the local pharmacy does not carry his med and I did not know till I came home. So tomorrow I am off to "H" to get it.  I am also going to visit L tomorrow. 

Learning to use the wood burning stove to heat the house has been an experience! First I don't know what my problem was but I could not get a fire lit in that thing! I have no problem lighting a fire in a pit, but this messed with me. Call me weird, I know. The first night it went out real early. Each night after I got a little better and now well its warm enough inside to not need it! So I will be saving my wood, and buying more this summer for next winter. The heater upstairs is weird. Its effective. 

This little town is something. After my visit to the pharmacy I felt very strongly that I should continue to fill my meds where I already do. So I am keeping meds filled there, at least for now.  The grocery store is small and very expensive. Not surprising, its a small town. Some of the people are very friendly, others not so much. Its got that small town feel. I think a lot of the people are the kind that only accept you if you always been here. Luckily I don't care!

We made it to the new Ward Sunday! It was very different. The people were very nice! We were invited to dinner this next Sunday. So we will be going to someones home. I cant remember who. Terrible I know. Boo says "you expect me to eat at a strangers house, and you cant even remember their names?" "Yes sirree I sure do"  We have not been to some ones home for dinner in a long time. It should be interesting. I liked the ward and felt pretty comfy there. I was asked by one person if my husband moved with us. I said "were sorta separated" she said "well that don't sound to final, that's good" I said "we will see" And that's as far as that conversation went. I figure we will wait at least 1 Sunday before jumping in there with all the info! See if they can come up with some good gossip themselves!

Tried to leave Baby E in Primary, did not go well. They ended up bringing her to me, she sobbed herself to sleep. And continued to sob in her sleep for a long time. Made me feel terrible. I think I will give her a while longer before I try it again. Let her adjust. Maybe get her around her teacher more. The primary is big, so is the Young Women's! The boys enjoyed themselves in Young Men's. This week is Fast Sunday. I am fasting for several friends. I love fast Sunday. It will be different to eat with another family on fast Sunday. Have not done so in so long. I think since Ind Mo days! I have missed it. We did it a couple times when living in Utah. Not much though.

Chubby went to Primary with no problem. He loves Primary though, and hanging out with other kids and people. Anyone that will let him talk for a minute. Sir N tried to refuse but in the end he went. He liked it also. I am so proud of him for going. Its been so hard for him in the past and we were scattered. He did not have his ear plugs but he still did great! He has been going with out them. Loo went, she liked it. She came home with the # of a girl in her class. She was excited to have girls in her class!

I just realized its almost time for Sir N to be Baptized! 3 more months! Can you believe it! I would love to have family here for him. He is scared of the water. He says he does not want to go in the water. So I don't know how I will get him talked into it. I will be praying lots and I think some Family Home Evenings on it. And just keep prepping him till he is ready and comfortable with it. 

I cant think of much else to write. We have just been busy trying to settle in. Every box I unpack seems to find me 4 more! Every time I think I have all the books unpacked I find more. I still have not found my skillet. My crock pot broke on the move. So I need a new one. Tomorrow after my visit I am going to go hunt for one. Hope I can find one I can afford.

So some of you friends and family write once in a while! We would love to hear from you!

And Thank you again B for helping me with my plumbing adventure! Now come finish up! Bacon and sausage with sourdough pancakes!!???  I know I know, to far to drive. But I have to offer, I'll feed the whole crew!

 

what makes you happy?

So a friend on a board had this idea, post the things that make you happy! She wanted to do it to remind her when she is down of all thats good around her. So we made a list there. I thought I would share it here, I may even add to it as I think of new things. Since I have been blessed in so many ways the list could go on forever! so here goes
good idea! ok here I go
1. hugs from my kids
2 kisses from my kids
3 I love you's from my kids
4 cuddle time with my kids
5 reading a good book
6 reading my scriptures
7 Attending Church
8 Going to the Temple
9. Knowing and remembering Heavenly Father loves me
10 accomplishing something that needs done
11 learning new things and applying what I learn
12 writing
playing with my kids
13 park trips
13 summer breeze
14 smell of spring
15 planting a garden and caring for it
16 caring for flowers
l7 knowing I have an eternal family
18 knowing there are people around the world- here and other places who truly care about me and my family
19 prayer
20 meditation
21 the smell of a new baby
22 new babies
23 baby toes and smiles!
24 cooking/baking
25 music- all kinds
26 the Atonement- knowing I can be forgiven for anything I do, and that others can also
27 family that cares

28 artichokes!!!

29 food in my cupboards,fridge,freezer

30 small food storage started

31 my new home

32 wood burning stove- save me money!

33 van almost paid off!

34 awesome doctors

35 sun shine

36 autumn leaves

37 fresh snow on the ground

38 working out

39 swimming

40 physical exercize 

41 physical activities

42 photos!

43 receiving Blessings

44 familt dinners

45 Thanksgiving

46 Easter

47 Birthdays

48 Parties with the kids

49 Holidays

50 BBQ's

51 camping

52 hiking

53 cooking over a fire

54 watching stars with or without telescope

55 learning

56 knowledge

57 one on one time with each of my kids

58 talking to family

59 hearing from/talking to/IMing/emailing JJ, Sammy, Damein

60 forgiveness

61 love

62 smell of flowers

63 memories

64 service

65 knowing I helped another person

66 cheering someone up

67 being a friend
thats all I can think of right now. I know there is more. but thats a pretty good list!

            So what makes you Happy??? share your thoughts 

Did someone say I cant fix the dryer? na no one would say I cant right!?

Cause if you did your so very very wrong!
So the dryer belt finally broke! Just so happens we knew it was going to, so we had a belt here waiting to be installed. After a long battle with the dryer it finally surrendered and gave way for a new belt! I have the battle wounds to prove it was a hard fight to win! It is working quietly to prove I won the fight!!!!! I am the ALPHA! rofl! or should it be "I am woman hear me roar!"
I had to use primitive tools (read did not have the right ones so I improvised) felt much like a cave woman must have felt at times when using a bone for a screw driver! I looked up directions on the web! They were not exactly accurate, but gave me enough info to figure it out and get it done!
The new belt is much happier on the dryer where it is busy doing its job, instead of sealed in a bag, wondering its fate. I promise it will get lots of use, lots of love and appreciation also!
Honestly I was pretty darn nervous. I had serious doubts as to weather or not I could take the dryer apart to get the new belt on. It was touch n go a few times. Most of my tools are at the new house, waiting for more plumbing work to be done! I did have to make do with what I could find. NOT EASY!
I thought since I have written about so many things I have learned to do over the last few years I better write about this to! Its right up there with fixing my van! Learning to change a battery! Fixing the washer! and learning to plumb!
Its been an interesting week for sure. I have learned a lot.

This next week will be very busy. We will be sorting and packing more. I already have some done. But not all. I still have to go pick up the boxes that were given to me. I am also going to be doing some part time work I hope. I got this months gas bill! OUCHIE! it is unreal. $717.00!!
Today being Valentines Day I made the kids dinner. Our new tradition is to have a nice dinner together. Usually something that Larry and I would have had together. This year we had steak, sauteed mushrooms, and baked potato. We made cookie dough ice cream for dessert! I was able to go see L today. He is doing pretty good. I am amazed every time I see him. He has changed so much, he is much more open with his feelings, and honesty. Willing to talk about anything, not clam up any longer.
I went to the doc again this week. We did some med changes. I am back on the Fentanyl patch. We decided to try it again. Last time I used them I had a strong reaction, but have since found out the ones I had were part of a batch that was recalled. So trying that again. He also changed my muscle relaxer. The one I was on was causing migraines. And then I had a cortisone shot in my hip. OUCH did that ever hurt. It was worse than a hep shot! But it is helping, right in the spot it was done. He suggested another between my pubic bone and hip. He does not do them himself, it would be the pain clinic to do it. I want to wait and see how well it works before going through it again, decide if its worth the pain. At this point I am thinking it would be, and possibly on my shoulder also. The patch is helping also, and not knocking me out this time! I prefer the patch, its a continuous dose, but with out the "high" so many narcotics give. So I am functioning fine. The Muscle Relaxer is helping. But instead of making me sleepy it wakes me up and I cant sleep at night. So I cant take it at night when I need it most. But that's ok I will deal. I prefer less mi grains. And they were getting bad from the Soma.
Over all I am happy with the med changes so far. Its only been a few days but I am not sleepy all the time and my pain level is down some. Not gone, but that will never happen.But I can tolerate it the way it is with this combo of meds.
Oh as you can see I am changing blog spots. I was tired of the problems I was having with the other place. I have this one,and its linked to the blog on the house.
It time to get kids in bed Morning comes early and we have Church tomorrow!
Drop me a note, let me know how life is! Keep in touch. Oh and if you click on any of the Ads on the blog I make $$ from it!
Love ya all!

pics of my Baby E

Boo and Basket Ball

Moving again!

Only this time I am buying! I have been talking to the owner and looks like its a go! Its an older home- very older, needs work but most I can do my self! Its on 1 acre! Has a chicken coup! A fenced in pasture! I am psyched! We will be in the country again! But not far from the town. Church will be a drive again- around 45 minutes. So that's a bummer but done it before I can do it again! The kids have not seen the house yet, they will sometime in the next week hopefully. Not sure of a move date yet, but am hoping for the 14Th. I am still having to come up with the moving costs, and not sure how I will swing that. A Uhaul would be the easiest way to move but that's $$ I don't have at the moment. If We try to do it in trucks and trailers from ward members I really cant see it happening easily. With 9 people to move its a lot of stuff. I will be thinning but still its a lot.

But it will work out somehow! I am looking forward to having chickens again, and a big garden. Plenty of room! No neighbors 2 feet from me watching everything we do! The house has a big garage, and a shed. There are 3 bathrooms. And potential for 5 bedrooms. I will be doing some remodeling to the upstairs. It is currently an apartment. I will change that and make all the rooms bedrooms.  It has a cellar full of canning stuff!!! A Dishwasher! 2 Fridges! so with the fridge I already own I will have 3! No more trying to cram it all in!! When I do my big shopping every month its always a hassle to fit it all in. Even with my deep freezer, I fill it all so that will be nice to have extra. The cellar will be a good shelter in case of a tornado! It has a wood burning stove!! Lower gas bill here I come! I am so tired of the $550 a month gas bill now, and we still get cold! It has 2 separate heaters, one down and one up. The porch is already stacked with wood to burn! It will finish out this winter with left overs. And there is lots of dry wood, trees down on the property that we can cut and stack for next year! I am excited, it is a little scary to take on the responsibility myself. But that's OK, life's like that. I have dealt with so much in the past few years by myself, things I never thought I would. I can do this. It will need painting badly, and new carpet in a few areas. I can do all that. The carpet I have never done but I guess I will learn. I do have to replace a pipe, and some plumbing under the sink ASAP. But its small repairs that I can do easy. Right now my biggest obstacle is getting our stuff there!  I am praying on how to do that, ways to get the money I need for it. So far everything else has worked out. Kinda stumped now but I know the Lord will provide a way somehow. I just need to find the somehow.

So thats our exciting news this week! We are moving! I am buying a house! And I am excited! When I go nect time I will take my camera and snap some pics to post!

If anyone comes up with any great ideas on the moving let me know what you think!

Moms heart prodcedure Monday was not able to make any repairs. they need to do further testing. One stent that was put in has partially caved in. And the aneurysm is right below an artery going to the brain, making it harder to treat. They are doing more detailed tests on the 10th and 12 to decide what to do. She is looking at a major surgery for the aneurysm and possibly open heart for that. We wont know for sure until the 3rd of March. Thats when she will meet with the doc over test results and decide on plan of action. So we are continuing to pray all goes well. Its in the Lords hands, hopefully he guides the doctors to know whats best.

Love the Huffins!