Thursday, May 7, 2009

update on the doctor Visist Tuesday

So I saw the doc on Tuesday. I have wait to post because I was/am not happy about the visit. They say no Scoliosis! So thats good, the curve in my spine is abnormal but its also minimal, the doc said not to worry. So then he checks my walk, my muscle in legs, and back, hips all that. The final verdict, UGHHHHHHHHHH
1st I have fibro- well hello DUH!
2nd I have arthritis in neck,back, and hips- Surprise- NOT
3rd My ham strings are so tight they are pulling my pelvic bone back, moved my hips outta place and are smashing all my muscle and stuff in my lower back. This is new! This can be fixed! I have to start stretching repeatedly through the day. Eventually with lots of persistence they will loosen and allow my pelvic bone to go back, hips to realign and I should have less pain in pelvic area/hips and lower back. HOPEFULLY. He claims the running I used to do, when I stopped and stopped stretching contributed to this problem. I dont know.
So back to the back- spine and neck. The curve is nothing to stress over. I have Myofascial pain syndrome (MPS)- big words for I hurt! Surprise! He also says he is positive there is more going on, he does not know what. Its not showing on the tests that have been done, and its to expensive to do more tests, not worth the expense he says! I am thinking I dont agree with that one, its me hurting, if there is a chance of finding out what, and even a slight chance we could do something to improve its worth it to me, but hey its only me, my quality of life, I am a nobody! GRRRRRRRR
My balance, falling, all that are related to the hip/pelvic bone being out of place.
So the plan you ask. Well Because I am honest with anyone who asks about my past it once again comes back and bites me! I had to sign a drug contract, standard for anyone with chronic pain. Basically I agree not to go doctor shopping looking for more pain meds, I promise to take only what he gives me in the amounts he gives me, no street drugs, no selling, 1 pharmacy only. In return he has to treat my pain, if what he gives me is not working he will try other meds. Now its standard to put in the contract that I agree to do random UA's checking for illegal drugs and others that are not prescribed for me, and that I do not have a higher dose than allowed in my system. I can see this, but I was told due to my past they will be enforcing that. I was pretty upset over it. I stopped drinking New Years Eve 1997! I have not done drugs of any kids since Jan 17, 1993! So now it comes up, I have to pee in a cup. All this time, I did not like being treated like its not been long, or I still have a drug problem. And theres not much he feels can be done. I am in pain, according to him thats life. He increased my fentynal to 50 patch, and gave me 2 10 mg Endocet a day if needed. I wont take 2 a day, I need to be able to function and take care of kids. He stopped the muscle relaxers I was taking at night, so guess who sleeps less due to muscle spasms all night!
So I left his office, went to the grocery store, cried for around an hour, called my awesome friend Dulie in Washington, cried to her. She is in constant pain, she understands. So why the tears? Well its hard to be told we cant fix you, even though I knew he could not fix me, take away the pain, and not that I want more to be wrong, but I was really wanting something that could be fixed to be wrong. If it had been new but fixable it would have meant less pain eventually! But nope not happening. I can help the lower back with stretching. He also wanted to do Physical Therapy, well I am 45 minutes away, not an option. I could get the same results at the fitness center in town, but once again thats an extra 30 a month I just dont have. If I did I would be all over it.
So nothing new really, life goes on. I had an emotional time after the app. Yesterday was kinda well I dont know, and now I am irritated but moving on. I will keep doing all I can to make me better, see the acupuncturist, and anything else I can manage. Eventually somehow, no clue on how but somehow I will find a way for the fitness center if possible. It will take me a while, no clue how long but thats ok, eventually I'll find 30 a month for it. Until then- even after I will keep with Tai Chi and TTAPP. I am not supposed to go doctor shopping, and get meds from any other doc. But I am considering looking anyway. Not for the meds, but because to tell your patient its not worth the money to do tests, she had Medicaid and has to deal is unacceptable to me. I have to wait for my copy of my contract to come in before I do much, dont want to get in trouble. I dont want more pills, narcotics, I want better quality of life, to keep up with my kids, to enjoy them more without it hurting, to pick up my baby when she gets hurt and not have it hurt, to pick up chubby and spin around with out it hurting. This is probably a pretty whiny update, sorry. I dont mean it to be. I will keep doing all I can, and most of my relief will come through alternative medicine, acupuncture and stuff.
I know the doctors were wrong 15 years ago when they gave me 2 years to be in a wheel chair. I may never be pain free but I dont believe my life has to stay this way, this much pain, and the pain meds. So I will keep doing what I am doing, looking for other options, and let needle woman poke me weekly!
On an up note my adrenal support came, the homeopathic and tincture! Its been 3 days, today day 4, and i already see an BIG difference in how tired I am. My energy level has increased a lot. I was able to work yesterday, plus get the shelfs in the cellar up on blocks, and all the cans/jars of food down there, organized nice and neat so we can tell what we have. I'll take pics later- you know how I am! I grocery shopped Tuesday after doctor. $700 in groceries, my food supply is building! Eventually hope it is enough I dont have to stress if I cant go shopping for a while. I also was given some recipes for eating raw! Some of them are for the dehydrator, and that got me looking for recipes. We will be using the dehydrator today!! FINALLY! I cant wait, I am excited. I found a recipe for Orange Julius fruit leather!I LOVE to drink em, I like the thought of having a snack tasting like one!! and its fairly nutritious! I wanted Rasviolies again, they were out at the store, sooooo you know what I'll be doing again! Plus with no wheat in my diet for a month I will be playing with the dough recipe for them. Maybe we can make them actually look pretty this time! Probably not but hey as long as we have fun making and they taste good!
I am working on the blog for Autism/Aspergers Still no name. I am thinking about Living under the umbrella and still getting wet! or Boo came up with Autspergers to go. I asked Boo what he thought, that was him and Gma's idea. So tell me what you think? Any other ideas. I plan on having a vote here today, maybe, unless I just pick out of the options I get. So I need some suggestions.
I hope this does not come across as whiny and complaining and blahh. I am feeling betterthan it sounds. It too me a day to process the doctors ideas,and stuff. But I am ok today.